In 2024, I wrote about my father’s Top Ten favorite
things. I decided this year is Mom’s
turn.
#10 Her Family. I literally could have listed Mom’s family going
from 1 through 10, which is why I listed this straight away. Nothing was more important than her children.
Well, except for her grandchildren. But
Mom was the type of mother who never missed a beat. She never missed an
opportunity to be there for us – whether it was attending each and every
school function, or picking up toilet paper for us because one never wants to
run out, or making sure my December 24th birthday was indeed a
birthday celebration replete with a proper birthday cake and presents wrapped
in birthday wrap (*not* Christmas wrap). Never. Missed. A. Beat.
#9 Our Travel Adventures. When we were younger and mostly
ventured to where we could get by car, Mom thoroughly enjoyed the majestic
mountains of the Rockies, exploring campgrounds, going to Disneyland, and
bargaining with the salespeople in Juarez, Mexico. However, I also think she
enjoyed the unexpected challenges that we faced during our summer treks. After
the fact, anyway. There was the time that we were navigating our full-sized van
with our trailer in tow over Independence Pass, Colorado. If you know anything about that pass, you
know you can’t take those tight single lane curves in such a big vehicle. You
have to back up, partially off a cliff, to be able to maneuver into the turn.
Mom got out of the van and directed Dad who could not see what he was reversing
into, while we were indeed perilously kissing that edge. She was pissed at the time, but I suspect
after her blood pressure returned to normal, she was rightfully impressed with
herself.
#8 The Beach. Throughout all of my childhood and most of my
adulthood, I can count on one hand how many times my parents took me to the
beach. Yes, we lived on an Island and had ready access to 400 square miles of
beach, but I mostly went with friends. Yet, for some reason, when Mom was in
her final years, she absolutely loved having my brother or me drive her to the
beach. Sometimes we would actually get out of the car and sit in chairs by the
snack stand. Typically though, we would simply drive around the parking lot, or
head out to Robert Moses and visit the deer that reliably graze there. Mom
always exclaimed “It’s just so peaceful.”
#7 Wine and Cheese.
Our little neighborhood had lots of friendly neighbors that enjoyed a
good party. Always chill and always at somebody’s house. Mom’s favorite social
event, nonetheless, was sitting on the front stoop in the dark with one of her
friends, while sipping wine and snacking on cheese and crackers. The stoop was
the closest thing we had to a porch, and perched in darkness they could watch
the neighborhood undetected. Friday
nights always provided an entertaining stage.
#6 Reading. Although Mom always seemed busy doing something
for or with others, she somehow found the time to read. She particularly enjoyed her romantic drama
novels. I don’t think she missed a Danielle Steel book drop for at least ten
years.
#5 Walking. Mom absolutely loved to go on long walks. Sidewalks
through little towns, dirt trails in the forest, roads around campgrounds, muddy
grass in apple orchards. My most vivid
memory of walking with Mom was somewhere in this great country in the
woods. I don’t recall following blazes
on an actual proper trail back then, which meant we relied on my dad’s sense of
direction to not get us lost, but that’s a story for another time. What I *do*
remember about that walk is that at the edge of the woods there was a field and
in that field there was a white horse. He greeted us from the edge of his
fence, his tail and mane tossing in the breeze. It was magical and felt like
that it was my parents’ master plan all along, to come upon this horse.
#4 Shopping. Mom was
a master when it came to shopping. At the supermarket, she would take advantage
of triple coupon days and employ a dozen other tactics I could never keep track
of and come home with money the store had ended up paying us. It was
astounding. If one clothing store ran out of something, Mom went to every other
outlet of that store on the Island to get what she wanted. She remained
undeterred. That woman also seemed to know the price of everything, all the
time, so she never overpaid. She always knew what an item should cost, and made
sure to buy it on sale.
#3 Chemistry. You
read that right. I’ve always said my mother was an undiagnosed chemist. If a
fabric got a stain on it, Mom would mix up potions, perhaps with toothpaste, or
plain old bleaching in the sun, or even gasoline (yes, that works surprisingly
well). She kept a folder of magazine and news clippings on different cleaning
recommendations and welcomed the challenge. If she couldn’t get a stain out,
nobody could.
#2 Sweets. Mom had a formidable sweet tooth. She was always good about making sure she,
and we, maintained a healthy diet. Nevertheless, she loved a good cake or
candy. I recall one year waking up late and my entire family was eating
leftover birthday cake for breakfast. Mom also loved soft serve vanilla ice
cream. She would say “you don’t need to add all that other stuff.”
#2 Charity. There was
weekly tithing in church, donations for the troops “because people forget about
them” toys for a wonderful local organization support kids with cancer, canned
goods to a food bank, and probably a few others that I am not recalling right
now. Mom frequently stated that “other people need it more than we do.”
#1 Animals. Or more specifically, feeding animals. Favorites
include deer, raccoons, possums, birds, and bears. Her exceptional nurturing
instinct was on full display. Nothing would make her happier than to spot an
animal in the woods or in the garden, or even at her doorstep. There was the
time that she fed raccoons marshmallows from our trailer door, thereby trapping
us in the trailer until the raccoons finally tired of us and the sticky snack.
Mom had also been known to feed bears through a car window. (No judging, it was
a different time.) And deer by hand in a National Park, absolutely. The world
was her petting zoo.
Did you notice I include two 2’s in there? That is because I
had eleven things to list and I did not want to drop any of them. Some people just cannot be limited to top
tens! Anyway, thanks for reminiscing
with me!

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