Kids are dramatic. My student got in trouble so he wasn’t allowed to do the rainbow parachute thing where everyone runs under it and sits on the edges. He goes, “This is the worst day of my life.” I kneeled down next to him and said, “You know what buddy, from the bottom of my heart, I hope it is. You’re five years old. I hope this is the worst thing to happen to you because that means the rest of your life is gonna be amazing. Or you’re gonna die soon, but hopefully the other thing.”
We went on a field trip last year and saw the animated Ninja Turtles movie. There’s a scene where the turtles are in the sewers and a character goes “Ugh there’s a cockroach riding a turd”. A kid behind me yells “Yo Tyler, why’s that cockroach riding you?” Genius.
I have a lot of friends who are afraid of kids. I don’t get
it. Gen Alpha does not know how to read. You don’t need to be afraid of them.
Kids give me shit in class; they’ll be like “Mr. Reed, you’re chopped.” I’m
like “Noah, let me know when you can correctly use commas, then we can talk.
They go between dependent clauses and independent clauses. You can put them
between two independent clauses if you use a conjunction, but I’m chopped.
C-H-O-P-P-E-D.”
Thanks for reading!
Rudolph
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