Partners: Another Take

Partners: Another Take — starts the same as yesterday but ends very differently. 

ROBERT: Bob, all I’m saying is, no one is going to see a movie called The Adventures of Spaceboy and Alien Lizard Girl.

BOB: Look, Robert, we have only three weeks left to finish this draft. If you’re going to insult me every five seconds, you’re going to stifle my comedic impulse.

THERAPIST: So is this project why you two are in therapy together?

ROBERT: No shit, doctor.

BOB: I’m sorry, doctor, my writing partner has no regard for other people.

ROBERT: But I have regard for the craft, which is more than I can say about the nonsense you’ve been bringing me for the past few months.

BOB: Eye of the Galaxy is a pretentious title. We’re not making 2001: A Space Odyssey. 

ROBERT: I dream of Sundance! I want to make cinema! 

BOB: You want to make condescending trash. 

THERAPIST:  Can we use “I” statements please?

BOB: I know you want to make condescending trash.

THERAPIST:  Bob, please!

ROBERT: Yeah, Bob. Please. 

BOB: She’s only taking your side because she knows you couldn’t write a relatable protagonist to save your life!

ROBERT: Excuse you! My protagonist won a Teen Choice Award!

BOB: Our protagonist! OUR protagonist! High five

BOB: Jesus, why do you have to high five so hard? You’re doing it on purpose, so I can’t type to write my movie!

ROBERT: So now you’re getting on me for being heavy-handed? Did you even read your first draft ofLook! It’s the Sun? Could the ending have been any more obvious? Spoiler alert: they see the sun.

Bob and Robert start yelling over one another.

THERAPIST: Gentleman, please! I don’t usually recommend this to my clients, but have you considered working on this project separately?

BOB AND ROBERT: …

BOB: What do you mean?

ROBERT: I don’t understand.

THERAPIST: You know, alone. You obviously have very different visions of what you want this movie-

ROBERT: Film.

THERAPIST: -film, to be. So how about you, Robert, write Eye of the Galaxy, and you, Bob, write The Adventures of Space Boy and Lizard Girl-

BOB: -Alien Lizard Girl. 

THERAPIST: Right. So why don’t you each write your screenplays and submit them both to the studio and let them decide which film they’d rather produce?

ROBERT: See, now you don’t understand.

BOB: She doesn’t get it.

ROBERT: We’re writing partners.

BOB: We write together.

ROBERT: We’ve always written together.

BOB: We’re partners.

ROBERT: We stick together. 

BOB: Through thick and thin.

ROBERT: In sickness and in health.

BOB: Even through Robert’s shit ideas.

ROBERT: I’ll kill you.

THERAPIST: Remind me how you two met.

ROBERT: This is a great story.

BOB: Did you ever see the film “Three Identical Strangers”?  Where this guy grew up and found 2 other guys that looked exactly like him?

THERAPIST: I missed that one.

BOB: They were all adopted.  Turns out they were brothers separated at birth.

ROBERT: Blows your mind, huh?

THERAPIST: That’s wild.  Even crazier that both of your adopted parents gave you the same name.

BOB (confused): Um, I’m Bob and he’s Robert.

THERAPIST:  Well sure.  But isn’t your given name Robert?

ROBERT:  Don’t—

BOB:  What does she mean, Robert? (Getting himself all worked up)

ROBERT:  Nothing.  You’re Bob and I’m Robert.  Nothing to get excited about.

BOB:  But isn’t Bob, short for Robert?

THERAPIST:  OK, gentlemen.  You’ve been coming to me for months and I think it’s time that we address the elephant in the room.

BOB:  Elephant?

ROBERT:  I don’t like the sound of that.  Isn’t our time up yet?

THERAPIST:  Not yet.  (She pulls out a hand mirror from a drawer in her desk and extends it to them.)  I want you to look in the mirror and tell me what you see.

Robert takes the mirror. Smiles.

ROBERT: Just a damn fine looking guy.  How about you, Bob?

BOB: Same here, doctor.  I don’t see—

THERAPIST:  Now look in the mirror together.  Notice anything strange.

ROBERT: Strange how?  I see exactly what I saw before.

BOB:  Same here.

THERAPIST: How many people do you see?

BOB: Just me.

ROBERT: Me too.

THERAPIST:  But if you’re looking in the mirror together, how many people should there be in the mirror?

BOB: I don’t like what you’re insinuating, doctor!

ROBERT: Our time MUST be up by now.

BOB: I’m not just going to sit here and be insulted.

THERAPIST:  I’m not trying to insult you.  I think you understand what I’m getting at and are just reluctant to admit it.

ROBERT: I don’t know...

BOB: You think he’s better looking than me, don’t you? (To Robert)  People always think you’re better looking.

THERAPIST: That’s not the point, Bob.  How many people in the mirror, gentleman?

BOB:  I’m leaving.

ROBERT: I never should have let you talk me into coming here.

THERAPIST:  How many???

BOB: Make her stop, Robert!

THERAPIST:  It’s right there in front of you.

ROBERT: OK, OK.  There’s only one person in the mirror.

THERAPIST:  Which can mean only one thing.

BOB: Your mirror is broken?

THERAPIST:  Are you going to tell him, Robert, or shall I?

ROBERT: I think she’s suggesting that we are the same person.

BOB:  What are you talking about?

ROBERT:  Two people living in the same body.

BOB:  How can that be?

THERAPIST:  It’s called multiple personality disorder.  And now that we understand what’s going on, we have a much better chance of helping you.

BOB:  So then…we’re not like the Three Identical Strangers?!? 

ROBERT:  I guess not.

THERAPIST:  Technically you never were.  There are only two of you.

BOB: But-- 

ROBERT:  Calm down, Bob.

BOB:  But—

ROBERT:  I think we’ve had enough for one day.  This is the longest fucking session I’ve ever seen.

BOB:  But—

ROBERT:  Great progress.  We’ll see you next week, doc.

BOB:  But--what about…Robbie?

THERAPIST:  Who?!!?

ROBBIE:  Hi guys, sorry I’m late.  What did I miss?

END

Partners

ROBERT: Bob, all I’m saying is, no one is going to see a movie called The Adventures of Spaceboy and Alien Lizard Girl.

BOB: Look, Robert, we have only three weeks left to finish this draft. If you’re going to insult me every five seconds, you’re going to stifle my comedic impulse.

THERAPIST: So is this project why you two are in therapy together?

ROBERT: No shit, Sarah.

BOB: I’m sorry, Sarah, my writing partner has no regard for other people.

ROBERT: But I have regard for the craft, which is more than I can say about the nonsense you’ve been bringing me for the past few months.

BOB: Eye of the Galaxy is a pretentious title. We’re not making 2001: A Space Odyssey. 

ROBERT: I dream of Sundance! I want to make cinema! 

BOB: You want to make condescending trash. 

THERAPIST:: Can we use “I” statements please?

BOB: I know you want to make condescending trash.

THERAPIST:  Bob, please!

ROBERT: Yeah, Bob. Please. 

BOB: She’s only taking your side because she knows you couldn’t write a relatable protagonist to save your life!

ROBERT: Excuse you! My protagonist won a Teen Choice Award!

BOB: Our protagonist! OUR protagonist! 

ROBERT: You don’t even know what character development is! 

BOB: Define character development. Go on, shut up and give me a half-decent definition of what character development is.

ROBERT: Yourdictionary.com defines character development as “the process of creating a believable character in fiction by giving the character depth and personality.”

BOB: Yeah man you nailed it.

ROBERT: Thanks partner. High five

BOB: Jesus, why do you have to high five so hard? You’re doing it on purpose, so I can’t type to write my movie!

ROBERT: So now you’re getting on me for being heavy-handed? Did you even read your first draft of Look! It’s the Sun? Could the ending have been any more obvious? Spoiler alert: they see the sun.

BOB: Well at least-- (Bob and Robert start yelling over one another)

THERAPIST: Gentleman, please! I don’t usually recommend this to my clients, but have you considered working on this project separately?

BOB AND ROBERT: …

BOB: What do you mean?

ROBERT: I don’t understand.

THERAPIST: You know, alone. You obviously have very different visions of what you want this movie-

ROBERT: Film.

THERAPIST: -film, to be. So how about you, Robert, write Eye of the Galaxy, and you, Bob, write The Adventures of Space Boy and Lizard Girl-

BOB: -Alien Lizard Girl. 

THERAPIST: Right. So why don’t you each write your screenplays and submit them both to the studio and let them decide which film they’d rather produce?

ROBERT: See, now you don’t understand.

BOB: She doesn’t get it.

ROBERT: We’re writing partners.

BOB: We write together.

ROBERT: We’ve always written together.

BOB: We’re partners.

ROBERT: We stick together. 

BOB: Through thick and thin.

ROBERT: In sickness and in health.

BOB: Even through Robert’s shit ideas.

ROBERT: I’ll kill you.

THERAPIST: I think I’ve figured out how to mend your relationship.

ROBERT: This oughta be good.

BOB: Can’t wait.

THERAPIST: You need to kiss him.

BOB: Okay.

ROBERT: What.

THERAPIST: There’s clearly some underlying tension here so I think we need to just let that out.

ROBERT: Can’t we just cry together or something?

BOB: Are you the doctor? Let’s do what the lady wants.

ROBERT: There’s no way I’m doing that. 

THERAPIST: Why not?

BOB: Yeah, Robert, why not?

ROBERT: It’s pretty gay, isn’t it?

BOB: Don’t be homophobic, Robert. What about all those guys in college?

ROBERT: Shut up, Bob.

BOB: It’s just medicine, Robert. She’s a medical professional.

THERAPIST: Technically I’m a therapist, not a licensed psychiatrist. But I do believe that the two of you have some unresolved emotional issues here that if left repressed may have serious mental and physical consequences for both partners and result in severe damage to the relationship as well.

ROBERT: I don’t know...

BOB: Come on man, nothing else is working. She seems to know what she’s talking about. I think we should give it a try. 

ROBERT: I never should have let you talk me into coming here. Fine, let’s get this over with.

They lean in to kiss. It’s a long, awkward moment. As they lean in, Robert gets more and more into it. When they’re just about to touch, Bob pulls away suddenly. Robert is bummed

BOB: I figured it out!

ROBERT: Me too. (But he means it differently)

BOB: What are you talking about?

ROBERT: What are YOU talking about?

BOB: The problems in our partnership! We don’t communicate enough! All this time, we’ve been ignoring each other’s needs. I need to take our work more seriously. 

ROBERT:... Yes, that’s it I also just thought-

BOB: You thought that you needed to listen to my ideas more! No need to apologize Robert, all in the past. 

ROBERT: Right….

BOB:  What a relief! Now we can go back to the way it was, before we started fighting all the time. Exactly like it was.

ROBERT: Yay. Y’know what? I think I’m still a little mad at you so maybe we should, I don’t know, do it for real?

BOB: You still have unresolved tensions that you need to work out?

ROBERT: Oh yeah, I think I do. What do you think, Sarah?

THERAPIST: Oh this is way above my paygrade, you guys need some serious help. Would you look at the time, your hour is up!

ROBERT: Nooo!!

END

Frosty

Playing With Plays

Wow look! She’s doing another list about her opinion! Well, you didn’t have to read a family’s personal blog if you’re going to be such a Negative Nelly about it. Anyway, I had my final Intro to Acting class today, and we’ve read a LOT of plays throughout the semester. I thought I’d talk about some of my favorite ones. 

1. All My Sons
Even though I’ve seen two separate productions of “All My Sons”, once at my theater summer camp and once on Broadway, reading this play was really enjoyable and impactful nonetheless. It’s a really dramatically written and great play, and getting to perform a scene in it helped me identify with some of the more complex characters.

2. Angels in America
Damn, this one is so long, and when I saw it on Broadway it took a total of like 8 hours to watch the whole thing. However, it gave me a lot of information in different perspectives about a time in history that I did not know a lot about, and did it with an interesting and frantic narrative. 

3. Gruesome Playground Injuries
This play is written in a cool nonlinear format, which I liked, and it has some scenes that are really hilarious, and some that are devastatingly heartbreaking. It has really great range and is a cool concept about how people are brought together through different means. 

4. A Raisin in the Sun
I really liked this play because it felt so normal and relatable despite being set in a completely different time and place than in the one I live. It also kept me engaged for the whole time, which can be hard for a play to do when you’re only reading it and not watching it be performed on stage. 

There were other plays that I read, but I didn’t have as much to say about those, and I’ve got a Secret Santa gift exchange to get to, so see you all soon!

Holly

Top 5 TV Series We Are Into These Days

I guess since my husband works for a network, we often seem to get asked what we are watching these days.  In the age of on-demand programming, there always seems to be something we are watching, something we are hoping to get too soon, or something we are waiting for to come back.  

Here is what gets me excited these days:

The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel   This series is a period piece which takes place in the 1950s.  It is about a married woman with young children (Midge Maisel) who finds unlikely success as a stand-up comic.  She goes against the norms of the day to follow this newfound passion – prejudice against her as a woman in a man’s world, hassles from her parents who thought they had given her the perfect life, etc.  The stand-up is funny, the storylines are interesting, and the period clothing and styles are total eye-candy.

Shameless This series is in its tenth season and it is still interesting.  It is about a Boston Irish family with six children, an absentee mother and a drunk self-absorbed father.  When the kids were little, one could see how they scammed the outside world to survive, but were always loyal to the family.  As they grow older, the now teens and young adults are wrestling with trying to be their own good persons but also still taking on their no-good father’s characteristics in varying degrees.  Great character development and an all-around pretty unique show.

Ozark What happens when a financial planner suddenly finds himself in a pickle with his business when his partner breaks bad? He gets involved in a money laundering scheme with a Mexican drug lord of course.  I am fascinated by the twists and turns in this series while watching the main character stay just one small step ahead of trouble.  Add to that his wife and kids getting into the same and every episode keeps you guessing.

The Walking Dead This is a series that I never would have watched had our son not asked us to watch it with him.  The show portrays life in the months and years that follow a zombie apocalypse.  Some of the gory scenes, especially early on, were really hard to watch.  But now I have become numb to that.  What I really find intriguing about TWD is the psychology of it all: who survives initially and why.  What this new world does to them.  What homeostasis looks like in the apocalypse, etc. 

Finding Your Roots I bet you didn’t see this one coming.  This series is a docuseries exploring the family histories of celebrities.  Henry Louis Gates, Jr. and his team dig through records all over the world to climb back up one’s family tree.  There are always surprises but the thing that amazes me most is how resourceful the research team is.  They navigate through different sources, different languages and country protocols, and even DNA, to make connections.  It is my life’s dream to be on this show if only I could convince Henry that my story would be awesome…

So there you have it, some of the series that keep us up past our bedtime these days.  Would love any input on what to add to our To Watch list!

Eve

Improv Nation

A while back, I found myself listening to a radio program where the broadcaster was discussing a book that had just come out called Improv Nation. One reviewer had declared that the author, Sam Wasson, shows why improv deserves to be considered the great American art form of the last half century.  The book details the beginning of improv and tracks it all the way through today.  Improv, or improvisation, is defined as the art of acting out a skit without preparation.

What really grabbed me about this radio segment was not just the history of improv, but more the discussion of what life skills improv teaches its students, and more so what they go on to do in life. The author pointed out that practicing improv hones one’s skills to think on their feet, in a high-pressure situation, with lots of people watching.  Think how many jobs for which that ability is useful: business executive, teacher, EMT, really anything and everything.  Another skill practiced in improv is becoming a really good and attentive listener.  If one’s next move is directly dependent on one’s scene partner’s current move, then you better believe they will be hanging on every word.  Think how many jobs for which that ability is useful: pretty much everything including personal relationships!

Recently, I had the opportunity of going to a reunion improv show where alums who did improv in college returned to perform improv again – some of them 30 years later!  First, I must say how impressed I was that they were able to flex the improv muscle after not doing an actual improv performance for so many years.  But that just illustrates my point -- because in reality they have continued to use their skills throughout their lives.  Secondly, I asked some of these alums what they now do for a living.  The answers ranged from writer to musician/performer to psychotherapist.  The psychotherapist was very quick to say the improv skills were utilized on a daily basis.

This could easily become a much bigger discussion about the incredible value of teaching and learning the arts and their undeniable role in contributing to any chosen profession, but for now I will content myself to point out to you that improv makes you a better you.

Eve